A blog full of randomness; about anything and everything.

Friday, 4 June 2010

'This swimming costume cost me £20 and currently about £15 of it is up my ass' and The Raptor Look

So we went swimming yesterday. Well when I say swimming I don't actually mean we did any swimming as the pool a) isn't big enough and b) isn't deep enough. What we did do is slide down numerous slides, jump a multitude of waves and collect an impressive set of bruises. 

There were four slides or flumes as I believe they are better known. Number one was a little tame - open air and a little slow, number two was much better - fast and in the dark. And the best bit is neither drop out straight into the pool (as I mentioned it's pretty damn shallow so that would be rather painful!) You come out into an extra long bath full of water (I'm sure it has a more technical name) which you always end with most of the water in that bath up your nose or in your mouth. Both also cause severe bruising to your elbows and your back.

Finally there was the best slide, flume, thing, whatever. It's a rubber ring slide. You float along a winding course of tubes around the swimming building, occasionally being pushed up hill before crashing down a massive hill at the end and into the extra long bath of water at the end. Fun. Apart from the bruises. And the fact that £15 of your £20 swimming costume will end up your ass. Even worse if you're wearing a two piece costume. Somehow you end up at the end with them simultaneously having gone up and come down which means you have to attempt to do some adjusting before you get off the rubber ring at the bottom. And if you're like me this was definitely mean that you fall out of the rubber ring whilst doing so. At least I didn't come off my rubber ring half way round the course like one guy did. His rubber ring came floating down minus its rider which meant the water got stopped and the lifeguard from the top and to walk the course from the top to rescue him. It looked quite fun as the life guard got to slide down the last bit on his bum. 

I said four slides, didn't I? I think I got a bit excited and counted the kids tiny slide. That was fun; we played on it when they shut the main slides. 

Now the pool that isn't deep enough for swimming primarily functions as somewhere to catch some waves. When you hear the lively tones of the Beach Boys 'Surfin' USA' you rush to the pool and jump some waves. Or you're so busy laughing at your friend's face that you get knocked down by the wave and end up swallowing all the water in the pool. 

Seriously though her face was frakking hilarious. You should have seen it. It was somewhere between a 'I'm being mauled by a shark' look and a Raptor look because there were arms involved. I think the only way to illustrate how amazing it was is to draw it. And the only away to do it justice is to do it in the MS paint style of the amazing Hyperbole and a half

Please note the blatant raptor hands. 

Oh ok it was a lot funnier than that; my paint skills just leave a lot to be desired. 

Now I shall run away quickly before my drawing skills scare you off. Plus I need to do a lot of baking for the parentals are descending and its my birthday!


Matt said...

Sounds like you hade a right laugh! The picture is ace :D

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